We all experience different types of pain – emotional, physical, spiritual, mental. The way it affects us is never the same as it often manifests in many different forms. Sometimes the pain comes and goes, sometimes it lingers, sometimes it leaves a dark shadow over our daily existence. How each of us deals with this pain may differ, but one thing is for certain: how we overcome that pain is never easy, yet it is always possible. The recipe for trying to overcome that pain is the same, to a certain extent: personal validation, personal strength, and asking for help when needed. By no means will we overcome the pain without any lingering scars, but we can come out of that period of darkness as a newer version of ourselves.
When the pain is invisible – emotional abuse, physical pain with unknown origin, spiritual misgivings, depression/anxiety – we often feel alone, misunderstood, confused, and scared. It soon takes over our lives and we begin to feel hopeless, unable to find a way to express just how we are feeling. When that pain is not easily categorized, diagnosed, or understood we go through many emotions that range in significance to our daily existence. And sometimes existing is all we can do. We begin to live life without any purpose because it hurts too much to do anything more than to just breathe. We lose our drive to find the light at the end of our turbulent tunnel. Instead, we turn to things that help us to lose sight of our pain, to numb ourselves from the inside out – drugs and alcohol, shutting out friends and family, food binging or starvation to name a few.
But there will come a day when our existence WON’T be painful, our thoughts WON’T be dark and disturbed, our emotions WON’T be used against us. In order to get to that state of existence, though, we must first validate that we are GOOD enough to be alive, that we POSESS the necessary strength to see better days, and that we can ASK for help from those in our lives. We are all worthy of living fulfilling lives, we are all worthy of enjoying the sunshine, we are all worthy of being our best selves. At the same time, we will not always feel 100% ourselves but if we know our own worth and fight for ourselves every day, then we will get through the pain, we will get stronger with each passing day and we will be the best versions of ourselves, both inside and out.
2 thoughts on “Invisible Pain”
It can be so hard without any validation, but it can be done. I struggled through many years not be validated by someone who I thought would have given just a little here and there, so self doubt definitely crept in. Giving respect, kindness, reassurance to even a stranger make self validation so much easier. Thank you for this!
You are correct. Not being validated by others, especially those close to them, takes a huge toll on those suffering through unseen pain. Once others begin to understand even slightly the pain someone is going through, then can that individual begin to receive some of the help and reassurance they need in getting better.
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